Sunday, June 1, 2008

That's Positively Negative!

I feel like maybe the older I get the more positive and optimistic I become, and the more negative and pessimistic others are getting.

I don’t feel that I’ve been that way my whole life. I think maybe it’s just something that has grown on me over time. I’m definitely more bubbly and personable. And now into my early thirties, the shyness that I have experienced my whole life is starting to finally peel away. Yes for some of you I realize it’s hard to imagine me being a shy person. But I truly was. It was more of a fear of saying something stupid or looking stupid. It used to drive my ex-husband crazy when we were together, that I couldn’t even call and order a pizza. He always had to do it. I would get immediately embarrassed and I just knew that if I made that phone call I would stumble over my words and not remember my name, address or phone number. So I wouldn’t do it. I flat out refused.

I’m so not that person anymore. Thrusting myself in jobs where I have to deal with the public, most of whom being total strangers, I think is what started to pull me out of that shell. Now I’ve become a real people person. I enjoy meeting new people and hearing their stories, so on and so forth. And I try to project my new found warmth and openness upon others. But sometimes I find this difficult. Because one of the other things I found while doing jobs where I have to deal with the public (mostly in a customer service type atmosphere), is some people can just be flat out rude and negative.

I was taken aback a number of times by people’s reactions to simple statements and questions.

“Good morning!” …
“What’s so good about it?” “Why are you in such a good mood?” or even just a plain scowl.

“Hi! How are you today?”
“Do you really want to know or are you just being nice?” Ok on this one I give you permission to even go ahead and lie to me and say “Fine.” I will accept that answer. But don’t just stare at me as if you wonder what planet I came down from. Don’t worry I come in peace. Is it so hard to believe someone is truly interested in how you are? Sad.

“Thank you. Have a great day!” I have variations on this one… “Have a good one!” I used that one mostly…
“Yeah right.” “Whatever.” “I will once the days over.”


But it’s not just that. I find it sad that now a days we just automatically expect the worst out of someone without a second thought. Even somebody we’ve known our whole lives. They’re eventually going to let us down so why not just expect it and then become untrusting when they haven’t. Or just untrusting in general because everyone else in our lives has screwed us over. I’m sorry but I just can’t think that way. If I put my trust in you, there’s where it will remain until YOU give me a reason not to. Not just because somebody else did something to me so I figure you and everyone else I know is going to do the same thing. How can you live like that? It would be living in a state of constant paranoia. Just waiting for the bomb to drop.

If that’s how you feel about someone then maybe you should analyze why they are a part of your life to begin with. And instead of projecting your negativity upon someone you don’t know; a cashier at the grocery store or the gas station, someone you pass on the street, a co-worker, whomever, try to smile for once instead. You’d be amazed at the power of a smile. And it just takes one person to start the chain. Maybe that person could be you today.

:D Spread the smiles.

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